Dave was bragging to his boss one day, “You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them.”
Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff: “OK, Dave, how about Tom Cruise?”
“No dramas, boss. Tom and I are old friends—I can prove it.” So Dave and his boss flew out to Hollywood and knocked on Tom Cruise’s door. Tom shouted,
“Dave! What’s happening? Great to see you! Come on in for a beer!”
Though impressed, Dave’s boss remained skeptical. After they left Cruise’s house, he told Dave he thought knowing Cruise was just luck.
“No, no—just name anyone else,” Dave said.
“The President,” his boss quickly retorted.
“Yup,” Dave said. “Old buddies. Let’s fly out to Washington.” And off they went.
At the White House, the President spotted Dave on a tour and motioned him and his boss over, saying, “Dave, what a surprise! I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in. Let’s have a beer first and catch up.”
By now, the boss was deeply shaken but still not fully convinced. After they left the White House grounds, he expressed his doubts to Dave, who again urged him to name anyone else.
“Pope Francis,” his boss replied.
“Sure!” said Dave. “I’ve known the Pope for years.” So off they flew to Rome.
Dave and his boss were among the crowd in Vatican’s St. Peter’s Square when Dave said, “This will never work. I can’t catch the Pope’s eye with all these people. Tell you what—I know all the guards. Let me go upstairs, and I’ll come out on the balcony with the Pope.” He disappeared into the crowd heading toward the Vatican.
Sure enough, half an hour later, Dave emerged with the Pope on the balcony. But by the time he returned, he found his boss had suffered a heart attack and was surrounded by paramedics.
Making his way to his boss’s side, Dave asked, “What happened?”
His boss looked up and said, “It was the final straw… You and the Pope came out on the balcony, and the man next to me said, ‘Who the hell is that on the balcony with Dave?’”
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